"Spark"~Tori Amos

Today was another day of being stuffy.  My fall allergies have officially kicked in, but it is worse than it ever has been.  So the stuffy sinuses I can handle, same with the scratchy itchy eyes & throat, but I've got the most awful pain in my ears especially the right side.  The pressure is unbearable and making me walk so off balance.  To top it off, sneezing sucks! My kids think it is funny when I start sneezing multiple times because by sneeze three I'm to the floor.  haha.  I have to say at this point I find humor in it too.  Its like that commercial "How many licks does it take to get to the center of Tootsie Pop?"  Mine would be "How many sneezes does it take to take me to the floor?"
On another note, today I went and saw a psychiatrist today.  He was very perceptive to what was going on with me.  I finally broke down to see a psychiatrist because I've had depression before, and I really don't want to go back to that dark place.  The anxiety and panic attacks get the best of me sometimes.  I also have been having issues with learning to adjust to the new me.  I try to look at the good in everything.  I try to stay optimistic, but its very difficult some days.  Those days when it seems like everything that can go wrong does.  You are clumsy and tripping over stuff, dropping things, forgetting everything.  I just get really down on those days and I don't want it to get any worse.  I've accepted this as my new life, but the adjustments are so hard sometimes.  They are overwhelming and frustrating, so my psychiatrist is going to try and help me out with adjusting and controlling my emotions which can be all over the place.
I want to finish off today by talking straight to other MdDSers and say that this syndrome stinks.  No one truly understands what you are going through except for other MdDSers.  But I must say, everyday you need to look and find at least one positive thing that happened that day.  Keep your head up (even if it is bobbing & weaving all over the place).  I'm excited to read others trying to continuing living their life.  That's all we can do.  Continue to travel, go to theme parks, go camping, go to our son's or daughter's wedding, trying to work, or get back to doing our favorite hobbies such as reading or writing...even if this scares the mess out of us, we at least TRY.  All we can do is TRY, and for some we succeed, and for others we learn not to do it again.  The one thing we have in common besides the MdDS, is the enormous support for one another.  So thank you for all the support for my blog and I send my support for your future endeavors as well.